Coping With Your Loss 2020

7

6

COPING WITH YOUR LOSS

COPING WITH YOUR LOSS

How to arrange a funeral during Covid 19

Can I delay a funeral for a later date, when government controls have been lifted? Funerals should take place as soon as possible, rather than be delayed indefinitely. You may want to think about holding a celebration of life or a memorial service at a later date when restrictions have been lifted. Local arrangements At Bournemouth Crematorium West Chapel, no more than 10 people are able to attend each service. This is due to the smaller size of the chapel. At Poole, the co n is to be carried into the chapel with the bearers exiting the chapel prior to the mourners being ushered into the chapel. Due to the two chapel layout designs at Bournemouth and the shared egress route, the co n is to be conveyed into the chapel followed directly by the mourners at a safe distance. Bearing of co n The council has asked that friends and family members are discouraged from bearing the co n into the chapel but they appreciate the significance of this ritual to families, so if families are insisting on bearing the co n, they will need to be contact the crematorium two working days prior to the service taking place. Hymns requested as part of a service are not to be accompanied by live singing within the chapels. Instead, choral backed versions of the hymns selected by families are to be ordered previously. No choir or live singing will be permitted in the chapel during services. Playing of Brass or Woodwind Instruments Any brass or woodwind instrument such as a trumpet, clarinet or bugle will not be allowed to play within the confines of the chapel. Playing of such instruments will only be permitted outside the chapel, in Poole, the during a service within a safe distance of 5 metres or more from the seated congregation. The playing of bag pipes will only be permitted in the outside areas. Any requests for the playing of brass or woodwind instruments will need to be directed to the Bournemouth and Poole o ce two days prior to the date of the service taking place. Ceremonial Guard of Honour From time to time, requests are made to hold a ceremonial guard of honour for the deceased. This is to be discouraged in view of tendencies to gather on site following the arrival of the funeral cortege. Requests for formal ceremonial guard of honour will need to be made directly with the Bournemouth

support that may be available for funeral services.Many also work with third parties who may be able to provide credit facilities to cover the costs of funeral services over a period of 12 to 48 months. 24-hour telephone support Most funeral directors recognise that this is an unprecedented time and provide 24 hours a day, 7 days a week telephone and other support. Other issues to consider • embalming is now only available in certain funeral homes - your local funeral director will be able to let you know if this service is available. mourners may not be able to assist with handling, carrying or lowering the coffin - the coffin will be moved using a wheeled bier. Can the funeral still follow religious customs? Your local funeral director will be able to advise on the options available for specific rituals and customs. Are there any restrictions on the type of funeral for someone who’s died from coronavirus? All funeral directors should have the necessary equipment, systems, processes and trained personnel to do this and specific ways of working prepared for anyone who dies in either an NHS facility or within the community, adapted from the PHE and HSE guidance. There are no restrictions that prevent someone who has died from coronavirus having a funeral, whether it is for a cremation or a burial. How can I register the death? You need to register the death before the funeral can take place. The person who registers the death usually needs to visit the local registrar to do this, however due to recent changes, you can now do this over the phone or online. If you’re self-isolating or unable to register the death with the registrar directly, many funeral directors will do this on your behalf. Can I still visit my loved one in the chapel of rest? You can continue to visit loved ones, but funeral directors ask that only immediate family or close friends do this. You will need to make an appointment to visit so they can limit the number of visitors to the funeral home at any one time. If your loved one’s death was coronavirus related, mourners will be unable to visit to prevent further onward infection and to keep you safe. •

Those attending should only be those people who are in the same household and who should travel together in the same vehicle. Are there any delays relating to carrying out funerals? All funeral providers are being encouraged to avoid delays to funeral services. It may be the case that availability of services will become even more constrained over time. Due to possible delays funeral directors say that family and friends should arrange the funeral as soon as practically possible. Are there any other considerations to be aware of if I visit funeral directors? In line with wider government advice, the funeral directors encourage use of washroom facilities for hand washing upon entering and exiting the building, and the use of tissues and hand sanitisers when required. Will donation facilities be available at the funeral home? To minimise the need to handle monies and collection boxes at this time, many funeral directors cannot take donations at funerals and are not accepting cash donations. They suggest that mourners make an online donation via a charity partners service so that donations are sent directly to the nominated charity with a small administration fee deducted by the online partner. Can I still have an obituary and publish details about the funeral? Although obituaries are still available some funeral directors are asking

or Poole o ce two working days prior to the date of service

Attending a funeral Are there restrictions on the numbers of people attending funerals at this time? The government is clear that funerals must be allowed to continue. Mourners must be permitted at services and a celebrant can attend the service, should the bereaved request this. But anyone showing symptoms of Covid-19 should not attend any funeral service but still participate in the service, for example, through remote viewing. Most crematoria, cemeteries, and other funeral service locations have limits on the number of mourners allowed to attend and generally these are close family members of the deceased person’s household. If the deceased has neither household nor close family members in attendance, then it is possible for close friends to attend. You shouldn’t attend a funeral if you are displaying any symptoms of coronavirus, even very mild symptoms. The following should be taken into consideration before attending a funeral: • you’re a family member or friend who has been advised to shield but, having carefully considered the risks of attending, would like to do so. • you’re a family member or friend self-isolating for 14-days because someone you live with or in your support bubble is displaying symptoms, or because you have been contacted by NHS ‘test and trace’. • you have returned to the UK, need to quarantine for 14 days but, as permitted on compassionate grounds by government guidance, can leave your place of quarantine to attend a funeral. • If you are normally self-isolating and someone who is shielding or clinically vulnerable is to attend the funeral, you are advised not to attend at the same time as them. When attending, you should advise others that you would normally be self-isolating

Webcasting Bournemouth and Poole Live webcasting of services together with a ‘watch again’ option will be o ered to families at the published fee. Wherever possible, families are encouraged to invite mourners to watch the live stream to reduce the number of people who attend in person. You can book a web casting via your funeral director, which can be recorded and provided as a USB or DVD. Visual and musical tributes will continue as normal. Scatterings, interments and charging Up to five close family members can attend interment and scattering of ashes. Waiting Areas The Waiting Room at both Bournemouth and Poole Crematorium remain closed toilet facilities or access to the Book of Remembrance Room in Bournemouth. The hot drinks machine will not be operated, with the cold water dispenser available for use. Books of Remembrance To ensure the safety of all visitors and sta and in support of the NHS Test and Trace, the Books of Remembrance will be made available for restricted viewing. No appointment is necessary, but visitors are asked to comply with safety measures in place with social distancing and the wearing of a face covering. Individual visitors or a lead representative of a household or support bubble group will be asked to provide their contact details for NHS Test and Trace when requesting to view the Book. The Book of Remembrance Room will be made available for viewing at Bournemouth Crematorium between the hours of 9 am and 4pm Monday to Sunday. The Book of Remembrance Room located within the conservatory at Poole Crematorium will be available for viewing between the hours of 11 am and 4 pm Monday to Friday only. to mourners and other visitors. Access is only permitted for use of the

How should I get in touch with a funeral director? Many funeral directors including their funeral homes are providing an appointment-only service so call before you visit so that they can provide you with guidance regarding next steps. Given the current requirements around social distancing and to keep funeral homes open at this time, many funeral directors may not visit you at home but they can still provide support you may need over the telephone, email and post. passengers are from di erent households only two will usually be allowed to travel in a limousine. If passengers are from di erent households, they must sit on separate rows on opposite sides of the vehicle. All passengers must wear a face covering, which fully covers the nose and mouth, when travelling in the vehicle. Passengers usually must provide their own face covering. Face coverings are required during all indoor funeral services (including places of worship, burial ground chapels and crematoria). Webcasting/live streaming of the funeral service (using professional or personal devices) may still be possible –enabling other mourners to still participate without putting themselves and others at risk.

outdoors and whether people attending are shielding or part of a social bubble. If using any business to help with arrangements, there will be venue specific rules and Covid-19 secure guidelines. You should specifically avoid activities such as singing, chanting or playing of instruments that are blown into as well as any activity requiring people to raise their voice. This is because these activities pose a possible additional risk of infection even if social distancing is being observed or face coverings used. Even though gatherings are allowed, you may want to consider waiting to hold a gathering when more restrictions are lifted and it’s safer to do so. How do I arrange a funeral if I am self-isolating or social distancing? Again funeral directors will carry out most of the arrangements over the telephone, email or post. If you are not self-isolating and need to visit their premises, they will maintain a two metre distance and usually limit the number of visitors to two so call before visiting. Funeral directors are also providing the QR code for the new NHS Contact Tracing app. Will they still be o ering limousines? Many firms have now safely re- introduced limousines for bereaved clients, following guidance to ensure they can be used safely, including the use of Perspex screens, limiting the number travelling to ensure they can sit as far back as possible and additional cleaning. The number of passengers allowed to travel in a limousine is limited to a maximum of four if they’re from the same household (including support bubbles). If people and subject to COVID-19 secure guidelines – unless otherwise specified. There are no restrictions that prevent someone who has died from coronavirus having a funeral, whether that’s for a cremation or a burial. But remember the guidance could change within a short time. gardens in England – unless attendees are all from the same household or support bubble. Funeral services can still take place in England, in places where there is a local lock down – with a maximum of 30

What do I need to think about when arranging a funeral? It’s worth considering the following before you contact a funeral director:who you want to attend, being mindful of those in high-risk groups who may want to attend • arranging service sheets as service books may not be available – though no singing will be allowed • recording the eulogy on a phone or other recording device so those not in attendance can listen or watch at another time • services may need to be shorter so the venue can be cleaned between services • whether you might organise a celebration of life or memorial for a later date, when it’s safe to do so • social distancing requirements • whether it’s appropriate to have family members bearing the coffin • giving particular consideration if anyone attending has been self- isolating or if they live with someone displaying symptoms, or anyone advised to shield • those considered vulnerable or advised to shield are advised to avoid any contact with the body of the person that’s died, including washing, preparing and dressing. You can now hold a gathering before or after the funeral. However, to do these safely there are certain things to consider, including: You must follow social distancing guidance on meeting up with family and friends, which can vary according to the chosen venue, whether indoors or Covid 19 has brought with it an array of rules and regulations when organising and participating in funerals. Although funerals are still taking place these can vary depending on where you live, where the funeral is held and which funeral directors that you use. The new ‘rule of six’ laws do not apply to funeral services (burials or cremations, or religious ceremonies directly associated with burials and cremations) unless specified in areas of local lockdown. However, they do apply to funeral wakes or receptions held in private homes or

Can I still visit my loved one in a chapel of rest during the pandemic? It is still possible to view a deceased who is suspected or confirmed to have been infected with Covid-19. Embalming is also

Are there any di erences in relation to hygiene standards at this time? Funeral directors already have rigorous hygiene controls in place when it comes to cleaning and disinfecting routines and these include handling any deceased person who may have died with an infection. These controls include the use of specialised health and safety equipment, along with specific ways of working to maintain clinical levels of hygiene and safe working environments. Are there any considerations relating to payment for the funeral? Most funeral directors recognise that this may be a di cult time when it comes to financial circumstances so they will be as flexible as they can to support your circumstances with usually a wide range of products and services to accommodate di erent requirements. They should also able to give you guidance on the government allowed, you may want to consider waiting to hold a gathering when more restrictions are lifted and it’s safer to do so. Even though gatherings are

that the day and time of the funeral are not advertised to limit the numbers of potentially unexpected guests arriving at the funeral service, which may prevent practising social distancing measures.

permitted. Your local funeral home will give you all the guidance you need.